Just yesterday, I was rocking my baby boy while singing a sweet lullaby.“Growing up is never easy. You hold on to things that were. You wonder what's to come. But that night, I think we knew it was time to let go of what had been, and look ahead to what would be. Other days. New days. Days to come. The thing is, we didn't have to hate each other for getting older. We just had to forgive ourselves... for growing up.” The Wonder Years
Just yesterday, I was frantically searching for Thomas the Tank engines and Star Wars figurines.
Just yesterday, I was planning birthday parties and sleepovers and play dates in the park.
Somehow yesterday became today.
Today, we are choosing senior pictures and preparing for that final year of high school.
Today, we are preparing college applications, exploring where he will spend the next four years of his life.
Today, we are learning that letting go means looking ahead – even if it’s scary and uncertain.
And, well, tonight, tears pool in my eyes as I ache to cradle my baby in my arms and protect him from all that is bad in this world.
Letting go is never easy, even when we know it’s the right thing to do.
I've been thinking about this a lot lately. My daughter is 13 and going into 8th grade. I know the next few years will fly by and I'll have to let go as hard as it'll be. I'm glad I have my writing because it's important to have our own separate lives. It makes letting go easier. At least I hope so. As your son starts college, maybe you can give us some advice on good ways to adjust to this all.
ReplyDeleteGreat thought-provoking post, Buffy. Firstly, I loved the Wonder Years. What a great show. I'm in the process of trying to 'let go'. I spent the better half of my life taking care of others, whether my mom with MS, grandparents with cancer, and then my children. When I began writing, I couldn't help ask myself 'Why didn't you do this earlier?'. Regret crept in. It's still there somewhat, but you know it really is all about letting go where we are in time and space.
ReplyDeleteSuch powerful thoughts, Buffy. I find myself saying so many times these days that time flies. Looking forward is all we can do, but never forgetting the lessons we've had in the past. Thanks, as always!!!
ReplyDeleteMarissa :)
I get this right now for sure. My baby is only almost 4, but it seems like just yesterday I swaddled her and rocked her to sleep. I miss those days...
ReplyDeleteAh the Wonder Years.
ReplyDeleteThanks for this great post.
I've been reflecting on this myself, Buffy! As I prepare for a Disney/Universal trip next week, I can't help but look back at the pictures from my last visit. My girls were 5 and 8 at the time. Our visit involved tracking down every single Disney Princess + Stitch. On this upcoming trip, the girls are now 10 and 13. It will be a completely different vacation.
ReplyDeleteRather than miss the Princesses, I will try to embrace the NOW -- whatever that means to tweenies!