Sunday, June 3, 2012

WIP: Another semen discussion that made me LOL; this time Mom has some ideas

I looked at the caller ID. “Hey, Mom. I was going to call you later. Did you get my email with the donor profiles?”

 I heard Mom clear her throat. “Are you sure there’s no other way, Gina?”

 “Well, the only other way I know of is to find someone to screw. And finding a screwable guy that meets all of my requirements isn’t easy.”

 “I know. I know,” Mom said. “This just seems so, so unnatural.”

 “And picking someone off the street corner isn’t? Look, Mom. I kissed a lot of frogs in my life and none of them turned into my prince. That’s just the way it goes.”

 Mom wasn’t about to let up. “What about a good friend?”

 “Mom,” I shouted. “Are you suggesting I ask a good friend to get me pregnant?”

 “Well. It might work. People do it in the movies.”

 “That comes with other complications. Like what if the good friend decides he wants a part of my baby’s life?”

 “Well, you’re an attorney. Couldn’t you get him to sign something?”

 “Mom! And besides, all of my good male friends have wives or girlfriends and I don’t think anyone would be willing to lend her man to me for a night or two.” 

“What about that gay friend of yours? He seems nice.”

 “Scott? He is nice. But I could never ask Scott, or any other gay man, to get me pregnant.”

 “I was just thinking that he might be willing. It’s not like he needs his sperm.”


 “OK. OK. I guess it does sound pretty dumb.”

 “Yeah, Mom. But I love you. Look, I wish this wasn’t the way it had to happen either, but I have no choice if I want a child of my own. And besides, you of all people should understand what I’m going through.”

 I was an only child. Mom and Dad had adopted me as a baby after trying to have one of their own for years.

 “You’re right, Gina. Let’s just hope it works. I’ll pray for good sperm. And I’ll get all of my friends to pray for good sperm, too.”


Earlier semen dialogue with bestie


  1. Thanks, Jess. That means it's good fiction. (I hope)