Let’s try something for fun. Choose an inanimate object and give it human characteristics. Looking for a snippet. I’ll go first. My object is my cell phone.
Like you’re always bothering me, man. Shrieking when I’m not expecting and scaring the crap out of me or tapping me on the shoulder with some message that you couldn’t wait for me to get. I mean really. I do have other things to do other than poke your tiny belly, which by the way is beginning to hurt my thumb. If you don’t shut up I’m going to turn you off – for good. What a pest!